But I am married, and I have children. They have been amazing through all of this. So amazing and supportive, as well as my family (including my in-laws). When the four months is over, I think I will continue to travel regularly, just not 10-18 times a month. I have experienced the fire that is ignited when you get to work with your team in person, seen their growth, and witnessed my own growth. It is something I don’t want to give up.
I talk about balance quite a bit and this is a prime opportunity to practice it.
Going into this program, we knew there would be a lot of sacrifices in our family; that it wasn’t going to be easy. I had to be willing to let go of the mentality of woe is me every time I became over-stressed or things didn’t work out the way I wanted them to. (flight delays, cancellations, ect) I had to be willing to look at everyone else who is sacrificing in order for me to do this. That my husband’s idea of a great way to start the morning doesn’t involve carting me to the airport at 4:30am or my kids not getting to hug their mom for over a week at a time. Bottom line, there are a lot more people sacrificing than just myself, and I chose this.
Every time I start to get stressed about booking flights, piecing together my travel schedule, figuring out which cities make the most sense to go to in succession, I have to remember those people on the other end of the flight or drive. The people who are opening their homes to me, disrupting their day to pick me up at the airport, putting their trust in my guidance, putting faith in themselves. When I think of everyone who is supporting me in this, the people I am helping, even the lives I am changing, I have no choice but to sit back in awe.
I have learned so much and I’m only a little over halfway through. I have grown too. I have learned that when it comes to flying, not only does my body not tolerate it well, but no matter how seasoned a flyer I become, I will never like it. I can’t wait to drive cross-country next week. I may not get to post blogs or work on my computer, it may take me twice as long to get places, but I really don’t like flying. Rationale tells me it’s totally safe, but all I can see if that it’s a heck of a long way down. (I think maybe I need to work a little more on my faith too.)
I have learned that time is worth so much more than money
When I leave home, I always want just one more day. When I leave the places I travel to, I feel like we could have done more with more time. When I am figuring out my day, just a couple extra hours would make it so I could do everything I need to do and still take time for myself. Time can’t be bought, it absolutely should not be wasted.
I have learned that I am stronger than I have ever given myself credit for
I have felt like superwoman and I have felt completely defeated in the past two months, sometimes in the same day. I have wanted to continue on forever, and I have wanted to quit right that moment. I am doing this. I am doing it with 100% of my heart and soul. There was one trip I got stuck in Denver and would have been there for 2 days due to spring break and oversold flights, leaving me 1 day instead of 3 at home. I rented a car and drove 8 hours so I could get those extra two days with my family. I have learned what resilience really means.
I am learning every single day
No matter what situation I am finding myself in, I am trying to make the most of it and use it as an opportunity instead of a setback.
I am learning that I am adaptable and am able to work with what I have, not dwell on what I don’t.
I am learning to let go of my overly ambitious expectations on myself. The things that I am usually disciplined in don’t have to be perfect. I just need to be realistic.
I am learning that I can be the change I want to see in the world. The ripple effect is real, and seeing it, absolutely unbelievable!
I know that years from now I am going to look back on this chaotic journey I am on and reminisce. It is something I will value for the rest of my life. The investment I am making in myself and the future of my family. It isn’t easy, but man, is it worth it!
Have you ever gone through a period of your life that wasn’t easy but absolutely rewarding? How did it change you? Share in the comments below!
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